I Was With Greg Hawley, A Great Man
It was Saturday night, January 10th 2009. My family and I were driving down I-70 Eastbound having just left a Fudrucker’s restaurant on Nowland Road that couldn’t take our giftcard due to technical issues. We were hungry and were headed to an Applebee’s in Lee’s Summit.
We hadn’t gone more than a few miles when two cars, a black Honda and a red BMW started tearing through the almost bumper to bumper traffic. I had seen this kind of thing before… but never on such a crowded road with the average speed at almost 70 miles per hour. These two cars were like something out of The Fast and The Furious. They would shift lanes with a jerk and then ride the car in front of them until they could get past then jerk ahead of the next car with what looked like inches to spare.
I laid on my horn as they wove past me. My stupid Honda’s horn hardly commands respect and I doubt they would have heard it even if it did. They made their way into the left lane, rode a bumper till they could pass the Semi truck ahead of me then it started.
I couldn’t see the accident due to the huge truck. I just saw a ton of smoke travel from the left lane across the road and into the ditch on the right side. Then, like something out of a movie, I saw a large light brown Ford truck flipping up the hill of the off-ramp. Actually I didn’t so much see it as I filled in the blanks. I just saw the top of the car, then it would vanish, then the top again, then vanish. Apparently the bottom of the car was lost in the darkness.
I quickly pulled to the side of the road. I didn’t want to be a part of the pileup I was sure was happening. But suddenly everything was still. The truck was resting on it’s side halfway up the embankment. The semi had stopped, blocking the right lane. The black Honda was gone. The red BMW was parked just ahead of me. Three teens were getting out. My wife said that I should go and help. I opened the door and started toward the truck.
I was afraid of what I would find. The flipping of the truck had been unreal… like a special effect… computer generated, but real. I couldn’t imagine what I would find. Parts? Human and automotive? That’s when I saw a man lying on the ground to my left on the asphalt shoulder. We had all almost missed him entirely, so sure that he was in the truck.
The Semi’s driver was there, pacing back and forth. Another man was praying in tongues with his hand on the man’s chest. The three teens approached to look. Someone asked where the driver of the red car was. The boy instantly admitted it was him. The Trucker lit into the three of them. Slinging the F word like it was nothing. Though I agreed with his statements, I felt the language tainted the seriousness of the real issue… this man lying on the ground.
By the time the shouting was over I found that I had knelled at the man’s head. He was lying on his back, arms and legs splayed out as if he had laid down that way on purpose. There was every little to see as far as damage to his body. I was grateful for that. Out of respect for him and his family I will not describe further. He was unconscious and that was good. Scary but good. I was praying for him too. Praying that help would come soon.
Several more folks came up. Some pacing on cellphones describing the scene, location and situation to a 911 operator. Others would come up to see, make some stupid comment or ask a sincere but clueless question then leave. This man was dying, but all one man could say as he looked down was, “If he’d been wearing a seat belt he might not be in this condition!” I wanted to hit him hard. Seatbelts don’t help you when your car is flipping sideways uphill hitting hard with each revolution. People just don’t survive a crash at 70 miles per hour no matter what they are or aren’t wearing. Plus, even if he’d had a point… where was the compassion! Makes me wonder.
Someone young came up and told me to turn his head so that he wouldn’t asphyxiate. Stupid. I told him that the man was breathing, swallowing, getting air, choking up. He had normal responses to his condition and we were not moving him. Plus he had a wound on the back of his head. I didn’t want to move it for fear that he would lose more than what he was. The young one went away.
I was holding his hand. Praying. Talking to him. I told him what had happened. I told him that help was on the way. I pleaded with him to hang in there. I asked him who was waiting for him at home. Someone else asked him to squeeze their hand if he could hear them. He didn’t. She left. Several moments later someone else did the same thing. I was beginning to feel like people were acting out Television shows on him. Just doing what they’d seen done. But it confirmed to me that he probably couldn’t hear me. Until I saw and eye open.
He looked up at me unblinking. Wave after wave of sorrow for his condition washed over me. I know that sounds like a cheesy novel… but there’s a reason someone knew to write something like that… that’s exactly how it feels. Cheesy or not. He was so broken. The Trucker asked where the blood was coming from. I told him (details omitted). “He’s all F’d up inside. G-D.” He was. I heard sirens and saw lights. I told the man help was coming. That they would be here to take care of him soon. I noticed a headlight stuck under his side and removed it to hopefully make him more comfortable. Someone shouted, “Don’t move him!” but I wasn’t, they saw, and stopped before they finished. The armrest was lying next to his left arm. I tried to imagine the force it would take to rip it off the door and how that would apply to the human body. I wanted to check his left hand for a wedding ring, his glove was halfway off. I didn’t need to do that. It would have been for selfish reasons anyway.
I didn’t let anyone move him. Fuss with him. Make him feel worse. I couldn’t control the scene with the teens… but short of that it was going to be all about him. As it turned out these were his last moments.
The paramedics pulled up through the traffic and rubberneckers. They unloaded and one knelt down across from me next to him. He asked me a few questions, I answered. He checked for a pulse. I saw an oxygen tank and mask being produced. I asked, “Is it time for me to back off?” The paramedic said “Yes,” then looked up at me. “Thank you,” he said. I let go of the man’s hand, stood up and backed up a few steps.
I watched them work on him. I heard a lot of talk I didn’t understand. I caught that they were trying to get air into his lungs and were having problems. They started cutting clothes and strapping his neck. Time passed. A back board was brought. He was transferred onto it. He was coming to. His legs were moving. It was gut wrenching. I imagined what it would be like to wake up in that condition. I stood there praying and crying.
They loaded him into the ambulance, closed the doors, and were gone. Suddenly it was a crime scene. Cops were asking questions. I didn’t have any answers. I just was there. They let me go and I walked back to my family safe in our car. Emotion wracked me as what had happened started to sink in. But I had to pull it together. Our 4 year old would want to know what had happened. My losing it could end a part of her innocence… something I will protect till the last bit is gone.
“It was bad,” I told my wife as I quietly broke down. “What happened to that man?” my daughter wanted to know. “He got in a crash. He had some boo-boos,” I lied. “They are taking him to the hospital so a Doctor can put a bandaid on it?” she asked. “Yep!”
I managed to get our car back on the road by driving through a ditch and up the embankment and onto the off-ramp. “We can go home if you want,” my wife offered. “No, I want to stay busy,” I needed to. She held my hand for a moment. Then I thought better of it. I might have blood on me. Then I remembered that I had held his mouth open to help him breathe. My hand, coat sleeve. The coat is in the trash in my garage.
We ended up a Culver’s. Good comfort food. Then I was more than willing to help with baths and bedtime. Then I played 2 hours of Rock Band 2 with my wife. Then it was bed time. No more to do. It all caught up with me. Flashes of the whole event like a sudden slideshow. I felt weak being so emotional. But there were so many unanswered questions. So much brokenness. I couldn’t help. Didn’t know what to do even if I could have done anything. Was he alive? Was he not? Who was waiting for him? What would it be like to get that call? Who was he?
I stayed up most of the night reading until I passed out. The next day was church. A full day of smiling, working, serving, giving, and I was already drained. God is good though. It was a great service. Energy beyond the norm flowed through me. No one who didn’t know would have guessed in a million years that I was brokenhearted.
I shared the previous night’s happening with a few of my volunteers. I needed them to know. It seemed to be cheating that man if his plight wasn’t shared. As if somehow not telling was belittling what had happened to him. Last night one of them started shooting me online news articles about the event. The early reports had very little info to give… and much less than I already knew. But it confirmed to me that this had been a big deal.
Then this morning I got the latest. They released the man’s name. Greg Hawley. Only one of the nicest, coolest people I had ever met. Yes, I had known him. Not personally… although when speaking to him he had a way about him that made you feel that you’d known him for years. Greg owned the Steamboat Arabia Museum here in Kansas City. The only museum I’ve ever been in love with. There is no place like it in the world. Full of ‘treasure’ from a sunken steamboat that was headed out west. A boat full of pre-civil war supplies. It truly has to be seen to appreciate. I take everyone I can to see it.
Out of the dozen times I’ve been, there was only once that he didn’t suddenly appear in the tour to greet us, tell stories, answer questions. He was one of my Heroes… lived a dream he did… but he was still so down to earth and so excited to share his treasure with us.
The time I took my sister we ended up talking with him after his session. I don’t remember what we spoke about… but I do remember sincerity. Genuine interest in hearing what we had to say. My sister, a hairdresser, commented on his brother David’s hair. Greg laughed and agreed that he’s always had a ‘large’ doo. He signed a book for my father-in-law. He shook our hands. Nicest, warmest man in Kansas City.
I remember telling my wife that I wouldn’t be able to recognize the man if I saw him later… I was right. I had held the hand of a dying Greg Hawley… a man I respected and honored… if even from afar… and hadn’t a clue.
Greg, you were an inspiration to me and so many people. You lived your dreams. You challenged others to do the same. Many did. I have been. You have left a Legacy. How many can say that? Thank you for what you life has meant to so many. To me. It was an honor to be there with you in your final moments.
———–
Links:
1 Dead In Racing Wreck On I-70
Steamboat museum leader killed in wreck
Steamboat Arabia Museum Website
Greg’s book:”Treasure in a Cornfield: The Discovery & Excavation of the Steamboat Arabia“
James I sat here bawling as I read through this. I think what you said about Greg at the end was beautiful. I’ve met him a few times & remember his warm smile & enthusiasm about what he loved. I hope you can take comfort in knowing that you were there for a man that was there for so many others.
God bless you
Thanks Tammy. God used you to help me find closure in this.
I’m glad you’re finding closure. What you did touched more hearts than you even know. I’m reading these comments & can see the hearts you have touched by being so caring & so open with your emotions. Most importantly, I am sure you touched Greg’s heart.
my goodness james… i drove past that accident saturday night on my way to a friend’s house. i said a quick prayer for those involved… that included you too i guess. something told me to come see you sunday before i left, but i never made it down there. we probably wouldn’t have even talked about it, but still… wow man. i hope you’re doing alright…. more prayers for you and the hawley family.
also, you’re an awesome writer/author/whatever i’m supposed to call you.
Wow. You were there. Crazy. I’ll bet the traffic was fierce. It was down to one lane due to the semi and a car parked in the far left shoulder.
Thanks for the prayers!
I love this comment on the Kansas City Star website by Brett, Greg’s nephew.
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I just want to thank everyone for the kind remarks. I am one of Greg’s nephews. I was at my family’s wedding and reception hall, The Rhapsody in Independence when I found out about it. I immediately rushed home and have spent the past couple days with family. Everyone seems to be in good spirits at this point. Saturday evening and Sunday morning were pretty rough though. Greg will definitely leave a huge hole in the family, and he will be missed at The Arabia Steamboat Museum as well. For the record, we have no ill will against the individual who ran into Greg on I-70. We realize that his life has already changed significantly and we are keeping him and his family in our thoughts as well. The most prevalent lesson we have taken away from this is that its very important to realize how mortal we all are… and that we should try to make the most out of every day we spend with our loved ones. Thanks again for keeping our family in your thoughts.
James, the scene you discribed is so reminiscent of the early morning my husband was killed by a drunk driver…only the person holding Michael was the man who killed him. Unfortunately, my tears and feelings are for that wife and children who lost their husband and father… and for you who was there at that very moment you were needed. Alana saw the aftermath and told me of it Sunday morning on our way to church, obviously not realizing you were any where remotely involved. We would have rallied around you had we known.
I know how devistating and how much of an impact a tragedy like this can be on a person’s LIFE. Michael was administering a ticket to a man, while leaning into the man’s car, Michael was struck and killed by the drunk driver’s car. The man getting the ticket told me, short of his own father’s death, my husband’s death was the worst thing he’d ever expereinced. He reluctantly told me all the gory details, because I wanted him to. It was healing for me to know there was a slight chance Michael didn’t feel a thing. The dash camera confirmed it and let me know he didn’t know what hit him. I believe the same was true for Mr. Greg. I don’t believe he was conscious for very long to have suffered too much.
When you close your eyes at night, know that you were a comfort to Greg in the way God had you be. I believe we serve a supernatual God. Your presence with Greg went beyond the physical James. I know he felt your love, compassion, strength, prayers and everything else he needed to feel from you, at that moment. Just know you were not there by happenstance or coincidence… you being there was primairly for Mr. Greg Hawley’s comfort.
You’ll always hold a special, tender, warm, close, part of my heart James because of what you experienced… Mrs. Hawley maybe that wife who wants to know all the gory details. She may need that comfort. You may be the only person who can give it to her. I’m sure, given the chance to hear from you, she may call on you. And know… you’ll hold the same place in her heart as you do in mine. And James, I would have wanted someone like you to have been there with my husband in his last moments… You know it to be true… I’ve been there… I speak from experience… God bless you. Love, Kathey
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Amen Kathey… Amen
James….
Thanks for this…
I grew up with Greg and was close to their family. Our families were, and have been very close through many, many years. Greg and I are the same age – 50.
I had not heard details about this before now… only little blurbs from here and there….
Your story hurt like heck to read… but, it gives closure… and… James… I thank God that you, of all people… someone whom I know closely and respect greatly… were used by God to be at Greg’s side, praying for him… comforting him.
Thank you… so very much for your compassion, and allowing yourself to be used by God in such circumstances.
Ron
Thanks man. Means a lot.
Ahh jeez man…
I really don’t know what to say.
But I’m guessing he is the owner of “The Auger”
at the museum?
That is correct.
Wow. That’s such a touching article. I can’t imagine being put in a situation like that.
I am passing your notes to a good friend of mine, he knew Greg well and helped him produce the museum’s video. I am sure it will give him great comfort to know you were able to be with him and being his “angel” as he moved onward to his new home in heaven.
The Hawley’s are good people and I am sure the appreciate your kindness.
Take Care
M
Having lived in this area my entire life and had never been to the museum, my husband asked if I would like to go as he had been several years ago with a school event. It was the week of New Year’s eve and I was in awe of the video and the tale of some of our last true adventurer’s. I was amazed to have Greg Hawley come into the small arena to tell the “Tale of Their Great Adventure”. The man was comfortable with people and his excitment and kindness was most prevelant as he spoke of their adventure and was anxiously awaiting each and every question. The museum is a trip back in time. Afterwords, My husband and I had the opportunity to meet Greg and to shake his hand. James I have prayed for you and Greg’s family and am thankful you were there for him, to hold his hand and to stay with him as one of God’s own till help arrived. I wept to hear of his death and to read your article of coming forward to help another in his time of need. God Bless You.
Wow . . . I’m really glad you were there for him . . . I believe you were an angel unaware . . . and an example to all those around and who will hear about this via the web etc.
As an aside . . . I appreciate how you protect your child’s innocence . . . and my children too.
Thanks James
God bless you James. It took a lot of strength and compassion for you to do what you did. My wife is a nurse and I have healthcare back ground and I always think of what I would do if a situation like this presented itself. You did everything that I have ever thought of. Thank you for sharing and my thoughts go out to the Hawleys.
Man, God bless you and the Hawleys, James. I dont know what else to say.
We just met Greg recently at the museum over Cmas break, our first visit. I’m just so sad…this family sacrificed so much to bring the Steamboat Arabia back to life. They could have sold off the parts and made a ton of money but choose to share it with the world instead.
James, thank you so much for sharing your story and being there for Greg.
I’d also like to suggest that people make a donation to the museum in honor of Greg if they’d like to express sympathy for the family. There are still thousands of items to restore…
What a beautiful tribute to Greg. As someone in the museum community here in KC, I can say he will definitely be missed. I didn’t know him personally, but I had visited the Arabia a few times and he was always there for the tour. He is blessed to have had someone as compassionate as you are there to help in his last moments. Thank you…
Hey james this is Derek Hawley, Greg’s son. Thank you so very much for being there with my dad in his final moments. It is most definetly up to you but we would love to have you and your wife stop by the house tonight to say thanks. If not I understand, my e-mail is ************* if you would like to contact me.
It was an honor.
I knew Greg and went to church with him.. I went to school with his three children.. Kristin, Megan, and Derreck.. The Hawley family are amazing people and have a support system like no other.. I know they will get through this.. and Greg is looking down on all of them right now. It’s always sad when someone loses their life especially like this.. He was so young, he was so caring and just had a way about him. But God has other plans.. He is going to be a great angel.. This was very hard to read but comforting at the same time.
You were totally right about that support system. I walked away from that family tonight knowing exactly what I want my future family to become. Uncomplicated, supportive, down to earth, loving and gracious.
James – I hardly know what to say… I am so impressed how you kept you head about you and provided Mr. Hawley with the one thing it appeared no one else nearby could provide — real comfort & caring. I would like his family to know, the story of the Steamboat Arabia is even known way up here in Wisconsin. I didn’t remember his name, but recognized his face. As I read the story, I realized why his his image was familiar. His efforts are probably more far-reaching than they realized. Wishing for peace for all who have been touched by this event…
James…..Flo and I are Gregs mom and dad. Are family is so moved by the response and caring words that have been spoken and sent to us. We all have been blessed by Gregs skills, his energy, his laughter and his honesty. We will probably never ever get used to his absence.
We invite any who would want to come to his funeral, especially to you James. We would like to meet you. From the time of the accident Flo has worried that no one was there to give comfort and cover him on such a cold night
The funeral services will be held at the Beacon Heights Church at 19492 E Holke Rd. Independence, MO Visitation, 6 to 9PM Thursday, January 15. The memorial service will be on Friday at 2 PM on January 16
Thank you again for caring
I’ll be there.
mr and mrs. hawley…..my husband and i were next door neighbors with greg and karen from 1983-1986. we had moved to independence from norhern kentucky due to my husband’s (jim) job. i was a 26 year old mother of two young children who was terribly homesick. i would pray everyday that the lord would send me a special person to help me get through this difficult time. my prayers were more than answered—-i received the gift of not one but two very special people—-greg and karen. they truly became my life line. they were always there for me whether it would be sharing a meal or fixing some thing that needed repairing around my house(jim would have to travel at times) or simply being an ear for me to bend when feeling lonely. it seemed that greg and karen always had a smile and a kind word to share. we even were invited to a few of your family outings. you will never know just how much those times meant to me and i want to thank you all now. greg was one of the kindest, most sincere men that i have ever known. i thank god for blessing my life with the hawleys. my heart is breaking for you all. i pray that you are able to take some comfort in knowing that greg lived his life to the fullest and had such positive effects on so many people.
Dear James, Thank you for being there with Greg all the way . He is my boss (1 of them), we will surely be missed a lot, his silly jokes, stories, he came in to work with a smile and left with a smile. The Hawley family is like my second family. We all love them and are their siblings. It has really been quiet at work these last few days, we just wait and see if he will walk in the door and say, “Why are you all crying and just standing there moping around get busy!”
We took off Sunday so all the employees got together and went in to work and had a little group gathering, it really helped us out a lot. Greg will be missed there at the museum . He was a really caring person. If we had problems he would be there to listen and help any way he could. We are all in shock.
God bless the Hawley family. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
Love Karla (gift shop)
Thank you so much for sharing this. I did not know Greg, but was very upset when I read the newspaper online. At that point, they did not release a name. I prayed for ‘that person’. The news was updated with Greg’s name and I then shifted the prayer for ‘Greg and his family’ and quite honestly the driver of the red car.
I am so sorry his time here has ended, but so glad you were there to hold his hand. Your love, compassion, and respect for life and spirit is exemplified by your actions and words.
We so easily share the details of a birth; however, death is difficult.
I feel honored to know the details of Greg’s birth into Heaven.
God bless you James. God bless you Greg.
James,
As I sit in my office in Tokyo, Japan and wonder why this happen to my friend I’m comforted to know that he was surrounded by loving angels at the time of his passing. Thanks for being there and being the instrument God which called you to be.
I knew Greg back in High School and even though I have not seen him or the family since the 70’s I was saddened deeply by the news of his death. He was one of the nicest men I have ever known and could make you laugh with his own infectious smile. I am sorry to say that I have never been to the museum ( I live in Colorado) but had talked about whenever i came into town. I wanted to see Greg and the family. What everyone says about the family is absolutely true. They are the most loving and caring people I know. I wanted to be a part of that family, Greg always reminded me of John Denver and i teased about it. He would just laugh and do a cute “Far Out” impression. It is my loss to have not made the effort or time to stop by the museum but Greg, knowing you , even for a little bit , was the gift of a lifetime. I will miss you xo
James, thank you for sharing your story and more importantly for being there for Greg in his final moments.. Your compassionate, selfless attitude of service and love for a complete stranger at his most difficult time is very comforting in this world where everyone rushes by not wanting to get involved.. Not only were you involved, you were totally committed..
The Hawleys indeed are a very close and resilient family and Greg was an integral piece that will be sorely missed.. My older siblings were very close to Greg, Dave, and Rita and it was always a fun time to have them hanging around even though I was the “little kid.”
You and everyone else here have accurately described Greg’s personality and big heart.. He always took the time to listen and share at any point whenever you ran into him.. It was almost like you never missed a second of being apart when you were with him..
My continued thoughts and prayers go out to Bob and Flo and the rest of the family.. I believe the hardest thing in the world to do is to bury your own child..
God bless,
Erin
James, WOW!! It has taken me almost a hour to read this because I keep tearing up so bad. I am speechless…
I can’t thank you enough for what you did for Greg and how this narrative has ministered to me. I had the honor of working with Greg over the last year to find a new location for the museum. I had come to know, honor, and respect him for his passion and integrity but I will miss his sense of humor the most. As we were talking he would get an impish grin on his aface and a little twinkle in his eye and then make some comment that would send us both into laughter.
You comments have helped me with my pain. Thank you.
James, I am sorry I didn’t thank you for being there for Greg and for writing this about him. It was a painful read but knowing you were there with him has been a comfort to many. God put you there and for that I am grateful.
I’ll bet him and his family really appreciate you. He might be your inspiration but you are also an inspiration to others. You did a good thing by getting out of your car that night and helping an injured man. You helped him get through those minutes of pain and suffering and I know he was grateful.
I would like to thank the author of the “account” for sharing. I worked with Greg for 5 years and consider him to be a very dear friend. Working at the museum was a wonderful experience, it seems like it was just yesterday. I have since moved to Alaska, so our correspondence was relegated to emails. I received one just after Christmas from him. I have been checking for updates and news since I received a call from a mutual friend on Sunday. I’m glad to see such moving and heartfelt messages and articles for such a wonderful person.
You are correct in your character assessment of Greg. He truly was a man for others and had a contagious spirit. I don’t think it has hit me that he is gone. One thing for sure, Greg will be multi-tasking. He will be a guardian angel for his family and is in the waiting line to talk to those who have gone before him to answer all the questions that have been burning in his mind.
He was a man of God – honest and caring. He will be sorely missed by those who knew him well and those he had only briefly met. What a gift. What a loss.
To the friends and family of Greg Hawley…
I stood in line for hours last night along with what seemed like thousands of other people, all waiting for the chance to pay their respects to the family of this man who touched the lives of so many. I listened to others telling their personal stories about Greg, and even with the pain of the loss still fresh in their hearts they laughed. They spoke of how Greg helped them with this or that, and all of the “remember that time” stories they had to share. I felt as if I’d known him just like they did.
Through my 13 years in Emergency Medical Services I had never felt the need to attended a visitation or funeral of any of my patients, but this was different. Sadly we are trained to ‘run through the mechanics’ of saving lives…starting IV’s, giving medications, right down to CPR. Sure we ask for a patient history, but our concern is their medical history. We show up at their homes, ask a bunch of repetitive questions, put them on our cot, move them to the ambulance and take them to the hospital. There we give “reports” of our brief encounters into their lives, turn and walk away; for the most part never knowing ‘what happens next’. That’s how we survive in this business; that’s how we do our job.
At around 6:20 Saturday night I’m was sitting at my desk waiting for my relief to come in when the radio began to squawk. Dispatch was calling for an ambulance to East bound I-70 and Lee’s Summit Rd. on a motor vehicle accident (MVA)-rollover with ejection. Without hesitation I grabbed my gear and headed that direction, not knowing what I’d find when I got there. I made my way through the traffic and parked just behind the fire truck, put my safety vest on and headed to the patient. A bystander [better known now as James] had been holding Greg’s hand, but stepped back to allow us to work. Greg was unresponsive, and I knew he’d been seriously injured. I was the EMS supervisor in charge of the scene.
The ambulance was right behind me, fighting their way through the traffic. They arrived on scene and we quickly moved Greg into the ambulance. He was beginning to come around, and started to pull at the cervical collar that had been put on to help stabilize and protect his neck. I reached for his hand and started explaining what had happened, what we were needing to do and how he could help us to help him.
Greg reached for my hand, and my intial reaction was to pat him on the shoulder, tell him we were going to do all that we could to help and then get back to the mechanics of the job. That’s what we’re trained to do! Greg told me his chest hurt and that he was having a hard time getting his breath. I just repeated over and over that I knew he was hurting, but that I wanted him to focus on me and focus on his breathing. Within minutes he was calm, and once again reached out to hold my hand.
Greg somehow knew that he would not survive and spoke of this to me. At that moment I realized that I was not there to save his life but to comfort his soul. I looked over to the paramedic to see that he was doing all he could, and now I needed to do what I could. I held Greg’s hand the rest of the way to the hospital and prayed for him and his family. And I cried…
The next morning when I arrived at work I was told that Greg had died from his injuries. Right then I knew that I had to attend the visitation, I had to talk to his family; I knew that I had a missing piece of the puzzle. Having lost family members to auto accidents myself, I realized that it is nearly impossible to complete the grieving process when you don’t know what happened in the last hours, minutes or even seconds of your loved one’s life. I had that information and I had to give that to his family.
I was pulled from nearly the back of the line and taken to the sanctuary by Greg’s son-in-law. There I met all those who meant the most to Greg, and I shared my story; my piece of the puzzle with them. They needed to hear that he was at peace with himself.
I know that Greg was there last night, and I felt his love for his family and friends, and his gratitude for what I had chosen to do for them. I hope that my story has helped those of you who are still grieving over the loss of such an admired man. My prayers go out to all of you.
I was so lucky to have been Greg’s hairstylist for about 6 years. I will not ever forget the absolute genuine smile he always had! I cut his hair and listened to his intiguing stories about the museum, his kids, and even his trip to Singapore a few years ago. I couldn’t wait to hear what project he was just working on that brought him into the salon with saw dust and or wood chips in his hair. Some people come into our lives for a lifetime and some for only a moment, all for a reason though. It was so devastating to hear (monday) of his death when a fellow hairstylist that also knew Greg, called to tell me what had happened to one of “my clients”. I had just been talking about him and some of his stories to some friends the day before. (which was the day after he passed). Ironic? I am confident that Greg is on to his next project! He was a very busy, hardworking guy that made it look easy. What a blessing he was to have in my life, even for a short time!
James….angels are among us and you are definitely one of them! Thank you for your writing this to help ease your mind and the minds of those who KNEW and LOVED him. My prayers go out to ALL of his family!!!
Wow. Other then feeling a cold that has nothing to do with the icecream I just felt…. I have to say good for you. Sure, I’m a skeptic so the first thing that came to my mind (No offence) Was ‘this can’t be real’
But I did start to think about it. Things like ‘Who in their right mind would lie about somthing like this?’ Anyway, that is not the point of this post. I just got to say… Well… how? how could you do a PODCAST only a week or two after this? AND keep posting on your blog? I’m sure you have been around death before, doing funerals and whatnot. But to witness death itself. Impressive.
You have my respect, and my admiration.